Luke Knows Her Face
by blackbird01
Summary: The moment Luke finally acts on his feelings for Lorelai, but this time without the assistance of a self-help book. One shot.


Author's Note: As much as I love the trilogy of episodes at the end of season four that finally brought Luke and Lorelai together, something about "Luke Can See Her Face" never rang true to me. They'd made Luke's feelings about Lorelai abundantly clear throughout the series up until that point, but then it took a self-help book to make him realize he really wanted to be with her? I'm not complaining about the end result, and watching Luke listen to those tapes was pretty funny, but I feel like that's not really how it should have happened (after all, who keeps a scrap of newspaper in their wallet for years on end and through other relationships if they don't _really_ know they love the person?). So here's quick rewrite of that "epiphany" moment in a way that I think rings more true to the Luke we knew up until that point.

It's only natural for a major life event to make someone feel contemplative, and a divorce certainly counts as a major life event. However, Luke had no patience for the deep thoughts that were suddenly coming to him now that his divorce with Nicole had been finalized. He had a business to run-customers to serve, food to cook, orders to make-and he didn't have time to think about what might have been. The problem was, after he closed the diner every night, he did have time. When he was alone in his apartment, he had nothing but time. That's when he thought about the things that were missing in his life. He knew he was lucky to have a successful business, but ultimately he felt like that's all he had. Despite knowing from the beginning that his marriage to Nicole was doomed, it surprised him how much he liked being able to say that he was married. Growing up, he had always expected to be married with a couple of kids by this age, and he somehow felt like less of a failure being in an unhappy marriage than being a single man.

On particularly bad nights, he wondered what his parents would think of his life right now. His dad would certainly be proud of the diner, but he knew both of his parents would be disappointed that he was alone. He had gotten very good at playing the role of the grumpy loner, but in all honesty he didn't want to be alone forever. He'd certainly shown his true colors when he married Nicole-someone who is happy being alone doesn't elope on a cruise ship.

After a couple of beers one night, he realized that his crazy sister and stubborn nephew had inspired this depressing line of thought just as much as his divorce. Despite Liz's track record and his negative first impression of TJ, he had to admit that his sister seemed happier than she had in a long time. And then there was Jess, who always inspired a wide variety of emotions. But despite the anger and frustration, Luke recognized that Jess was not entirely unlike himself-a guy who acted like he didn't need anyone when the truth was completely opposite. It wasn't lost on him that the way he pushed away Rory had a lot of similarities to his relationship with Lorelai.

The deep thoughts always came back to Lorelai. There had been Rachel and Nicole and some others in between, but when it came down to having a real marriage and a real family, the only person he wanted to do that with was Lorelai. He'd tried to deny it for years, but he knew she was the one. She was smart and funny and passionate and caring and seemed to understand him while knowing how to push him ever so slightly outside his comfort zone so that he didn't end up a miserable loner. They'd had so many moments lately-moments when he thought something would happen, but they never did. She had been seconds away from admitting why she didn't want him to move to Litchfield when they were in the church breaking the bells, only to be interrupted by the minister. He consoled himself by saying that it wouldn't have been the right time anyway-he had been with Nicole and she had been with Jason. But today she had come out and told him that Jason was no longer in the picture and that she didn't want to be alone, but he'd still said nothing. She looked so lovely, all flush with excitement over her nearly-finished inn and the stress of getting everything ready for opening day, that he just got too tongue-tied. And now he worried that perhaps all the feelings were one-sided, that she really did see him as a friend and nothing more. He reminded himself again of the moment in the church before he went to sleep that night, telling himself that she was probably just as scared as he was.

The next morning his head was still cloudy from the previous night's beer and tossing and turning when Liz and TJ surprised him with their last-minute wedding news. Liz jabbered on about her Renaissance fair wedding plans, insisting that Luke wouldn't have to help with a thing, while he just tried to soak in the news. Moments later, while Liz was momentarily quiet eating a piece of pie, Lorelai walked in the door begging for coffee. Suddenly something clicked in Luke's head.

"So Liz is getting married," Luke blurted out as he poured Lorelai's coffee, praying that Liz couldn't hear him from her table and come over to butt into the conversation.

"Yeah?" Lorelai responded with a smile. "That's great. When's the big day?"

"Next week," Luke answered quickly as he felt his hands getting sweaty.

"Next week? What's the big rush?"

"I guess she loves him or something. Oh, and they want all of their Renaissance fair friends to be able to come before the circuit starts," Luke said, only remembering at the last minute why Liz and TJ were in fact getting married so quickly.

"Ooh, are they going to be all dressed up in Renaissance gear?" Lorelai asked excitedly.

"Yeah, it's going to be a whole Renaissance wedding with costumes and everyone talking weird and everything."

"That sounds fantastic."

"Do you want to come? With me? I mean, obviously I have to be there ..." Luke trailed off as his mouth suddenly felt very dry.

"I wouldn't miss it-the potential for mocking is off the charts. When is it?"

"Next Thursday in the square."

"Perfect, I'll meet you here."

"No," Luke replied, thinking that it wouldn't be date-like at all if she met him at the diner. "I'll pick you up ... in case you want to wear uncomfortable shoes or something."

"Wait, if they're inviting all their Renaissance fair friends, does that mean _everyone_ is going to be in costumes?"

"Probably," Luke replied with a sigh. "But that doesn't mean you have to go out and buy an outfit or anything."

"Believe me, I don't need an excuse to shop," Lorelai replied. "Does that mean you'll be dressed up as a jester or something?"

"No, I will put on a suit and tie, but I draw the line at ruffles and tights."

"Good to know. I'll plan my outfit accordingly," Lorelai said with a wink.

"I have a feeling I should be concerned about that," Luke replied, barely able to contain the smile that was creeping across his face.

"Well," Lorelai began after they looked at each other just a moment longer than usual, "I have a meeting at the inn, so I need to grab a muffin to go."

"Sure," Luke replied as he grabbed a muffin and poured a to-go cup of coffee, knowing she'd want another cup even though she hadn't asked.

"What about armor?" Lorelai asked as she handed him her payment at the register.

"Armor?" Luke asked, still reeling from what had just transpired.

"Yeah, there were knights during the Renaissance, right?"

"I believe so, but no," Luke replied.

"You're no fun," Lorelai said with a smile.

"Maybe, but at least I won't rattle every time I walk."

Seconds later Lorelai was out the door and heading to the Dragonfly and Luke had to remind himself to breathe. Unfortunately Liz noticed the slightly dazed look on her brother's face.

"You OK bro?" Liz asked as she brought her empty plate to the counter.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Luke replied, snapping out of his stupor and turning to start another pot of coffee.

"Was that Lorelai who just walked out of here?"

"Yeah, she stopped in for coffee."

"Darn, I can't believe I missed her, I was going to invite her to the wedding."

"I already invited her," Luke said without thinking of the consequences of revealing that bit of news to his sister.

"Oh ... " Liz said as she began to connect the dots. "You asked her as your date! That's why you looked like you were about the pass out."

"I was not going to pass out," Luke denied. "And I just asked her to go with me, not as a date."

"But you're hoping it turns into a date, right?" Liz prodded.

"I've got a business to run here ..."

"Alright, I'll leave you alone," Liz replied with a smirk. "But I think it's great."

Luke simply shook his head at his sister in silence and went to go refill coffee cups and clear plates. However, that night when he closed the diner and went upstairs to his empty apartment, instead of thinking of the life he wanted but didn't have, he thought of Liz's wedding and his date who was probably already planning her outfit.


End file.
